1.Ask them! Have regular conversations to keep the lines of communication open.
2.Sudden onset of secrecy and avoidance.
3.Sudden and unreasonable outbursts of anger disproportionate to what has caused the anger.
4.Unauthorised absence, lateness, missing curfews and a struggle to come up with valid reasons for their behaviour.
5.Change in peer group with a reluctance to letting you meet the new friends.
6.Increased incidence of missing money and other valuables around the home.
7.A change in grades and attitude towards school in general.
8.Radical and severe mood swings, decreasing interest in usual activities.
This list is not exhaustive and there may be many other signs that are unique to your child and your situation. Also bear in mind that your child is going through many changes which may manifest themselves in one or several of the ways listed above. It is therefore important not to jump to conclusions. Find opportunities to spend time alone with your child. Try to think of something they like to do, and do it together. Be creative; join them in the kitchen on dish-night; catch them right before they go to sleep; take them shopping – your treat! Bake their favourite desert, on one condition – you do it together. Meal times are an invaluable time for touching bases with the family; insist on meals together – it may be the only time throughout the day that you get to eyeball your child. And finally, don’t try to be a hero, solicit the help of friends and family, you’d be surprised how many of the people around you have experienced similar situations. Parenting can be exhausting at times but remember that in having children you automatically by default become enrolled into the parenting community. Your instincts will direct you on who to turn to and how much help to accept. Remembering that hindsight is 20/20 strive to be proactive in your child’s life rather than reactive.
