A New Dawn

I never really felt a true connection to the pledge, though we do it every morning; hand on heart eyes forward. I never really understood why people always referred to this as the Greatest Nation when I perceived so much injustice and pain. I never felt moved to tears when I joined in with the "Star Spangled Banner", it was actually quite a confusing song until we broke it down in our unit study. I 'liked' America, I was fond of it's uniqueness, the quirkiness of the people and the scope for diversity.
My children are American, my husband is American so it is important to me to understand American-ness (just made that up) - but I didn't. To me it was not the land of opportunity that everyone talked about. I witnessed immigrants turned down for opportunities of citizenship and a better life. I have experienced the cut-throat mentality of educators, college professors and Deans trying to hold students back, when their job description depicts the contrary. I have seen an education system that shouts 'no child left behind', but screams 'not my problem'. So for years I have been confused, I've tried to 'get it', and when I didn't I resigned myself to the notion that maybe it is something outside of me; you either felt it or you didn't.
In almost everything I do, I have a desperate need to understand it, to break it down into a logical order that makes sense to me. If this doesn't happen I feel disconnected and eventually stop trying to understand. This is where I was with the Grand Old US of A. I am here because the people I love are here, this is where they belong, and by default where I belong (UK ex-pat). So I was happy to make the best of it in a disconnected sort of way - and be content.
But on the 4th November 2008 everything changed. I was not anticipating this. I was excited about the whole election race and all the hysteria that went with it, but I did not expect it to change me.
You see it's not really about me, it's about our children. I have always looked at them as brilliant, exceptional human beings. I am frightened by what I have been given to be a steward over. I feel unworthy and often worry that I am unqualified for this awesome task; I need to get this right. They have been blessed with so much. When I look at them I see potential, I see brilliance, I see grace - but sometimes niggling at the back of my mind I would also see challenges, struggle and fight.
Now though, added to the equation I also see hope and endless possibilities. When I look up I no longer see a ceiling.
Today, I can truly say that I am proud of America, I am excited for what the future holds. Not because of his race, but because he is the right man for the job. Only a GREAT NATION could achieve what we did on November 4th 2008.